I Postponed My Dreams Because I Want to Pursue Them the “Cool” Way

I’m scared that people will think I’ve lost

Bertilla Niveda
5 min readMay 31, 2022
Photo by Benjamin Sow on Unsplash

Do you ever randomly surf online and suddenly, your brain gives you a major epiphany like ‘Girl, why are you not seeing this?!’ That happened to me today, so I ignored my to-do list and got on here to jot it down.

I quit my job last year to “pursue my dreams.” And I did, to some extent.

It seemed to other people that I was livin’ la vida loca, just getting up whenever I want, working on whatever I want, and creating content. But I somehow ended up getting sucked into boring client-focused work that sucked the soul out of me. Kind of like my 9–5.

But whether it’s pursuing my passions or doing things I hate, I’ve always gravitated towards the projects that will give me returns, sooner or later.

‘Who’s winning the race, my friend?’

Let me give you a little back-story.

Two years ago, back when I was working an entry-level IT job, I was shopping in a mall when I ran into an old school friend of mine. Being quite condescending and subtly snarky as ever, she asked me how much I earn and then she made a comment. A comment so innocent, but oh-so-loaded.

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Bertilla Niveda

Artist, engineer, and writer with a lot to say. You can connect with me at bertillaniveda@gmail.com | Learn more→ https://bit.ly/3Ba489Q